Paradigm Shift
Who I once was, I no longer am.
Who I will be is ever at hand.
Dreams have been shattered and ground into dust.
The pathway from here henceforth I do not trust.
Where am I going, no one knows.
Mediocrity reigns since destroyed are my goals.
Never again do I want to show my face.
Solemnly I stand completely out of place.
Each agonizing step crushes under the weight,
Of a poor outlook on life and its subsequent fate.
So where am I going? In circles I fear.
Sometimes going up, sometimes down, far and near.
I’m spinning in circles, floundering in the way.
Directionless and aimless, I wander each day.
How do I find my patch since my soul has been torn?
I’m hopeless, helpless, tired and worn.
Depression sets in where hope once stood fast.
Thoughts of darkness seem to linger and last.
How do you find hope when your dreams are all gone?
Nothing feels right, everything seems to be wrong.
But on I must go, and a new life rebuild.
From the mire and muck, from the lies that were willed.
Maybe someday life will return to these bones.
Out of sheer spite, determination and willpower alone.
©2024 Stephanie Blomquist
Written while in a psych hospital after having some of my dreams crushed.
